Teach us! Gin Ichi-Sensei!
by whatamidoing765
Summary: Gin now has a smaller segment here since Arrancar Encyclopedia was cancelled. Send in questions and he will teach you about what ever you asked him about.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: First time I did something Bleach. I do not own Bleach and it belongs to Tite Kubo.**

* * *

**Teach us! Gin Ichi-Sensei!**

**"Hey there! They bumped off Arrancar Encyclopedia and now it's...Xuction Dictionary... Who wants to see that? I'm sure ma lady fans want more of me. Oh, now I have a new segment! It's called "Teach us! Gin Ichi-sensei!" Now you ladies will get more of me and none of that borin' Fullbringer stuff. So I want you to send in questions about anything and I will do normal ma teachin' role in this. That sound good-" **

**"Hey, hey... This is my segment." Gintoki Sakata in his Ginpachi-Sensei outfit walks up to Gin. "Don't just go and steal other people's segments."**

**"No, it's mine. Ma name's on there."**

**"Gin's my name."**

**"No, it's mine."**

**"Buddy, if you want a segment, go by TV Tokyo-Ah!" **

**"Shoot 'em dead, Shinso." Gin's blade stabs through Gintoki's jacket, sending him far across the room and into a locker that immediately locks with him inside. "Hey! Let me out!" **

**"Oops." Gin "innocently" kicks the locker out the window with Gintoki yelling inside. "Now class, let's get started!" The room had the Arrancars sitting in the desks groaning. **

**"Now, now. Don't be that way..." Grimmjow yells out, "You would be an awful teacher! I bet Szayel here would be better than you!" Szayel acts flattered,****"Thank you. Can I go up-"**

**"And what would he do? Cut up a human body up?"**

**"Yeah, that sounds waaay better than you would do! I always wanted to know what goes on in human bodies anyway!" **

**"Well, this is what'cha got. Come now, don't be shy! Send in ya questions!" ****  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Teach us! Gin Ichi-sensei!**

**"Alright, let's get started. I have a couple of papers from the fans. This one's from Annabella Lucy Nox."**

Can you ask Grimmkitty(Grimmjow) when he's going to actually show his face in the manga? We've seen his sword and arm. I WANT TO SEE HIS FACE AND I WANT TO SEE IT SOON!

**"Okay, it's not for me..."**

**"I'll show my face when I f***ing wanna!" Gin whispers to the screen, "He's gonna appear in Chapter-" **

**BLEEEEEEEEEEEP**

**PLEASE STAND BY**

**Tite Kubo is seen hold a cord that powers the screen you're watching. He puts it back in and he flies away with wings out the studio. **

**"Ok! Now you guys know when he gonna appear! Next review! This one's from Guest."**

dayum gurl let em study on kurosaki ;)

**"Kurosaki? Kurosaki, you here?" Ichigo raises his hand in the back of the room. "Why am I here?"**

**"We need people to fill up the chairs! Whatda they mean by "study on you?" Throw books on ya?"**

**"Oh, oh! I call first hit!", yelled out Grimmjow. **

**"Now, now class, we've to do this the proper way. I'll show ya." Gin takes a textbook and drops it onto Ichigo's head. "OW!"**

**"Okay, everyone study on Kurosaki-kun!" Grimmjow takes an armful of books and drops them on him, knocking Ichigo down.****"Ah! Hey!" Ulquiorra drops twenty dictionaries onto him.**

**"OOOF!" **

**Wonderwiess goes up to the lying Ichigo and drools over him. **

**"Ugh! Eeeew!" **

**Nnoitra pushes him away and gets the fish tank from the back to drop that on Ichigo. "Ah! The glass is cutting into my face! The fish is making this hurt more!"**

** Szayel gets two beakers of an unusual colors and drops those two onto him. "GAAAAAAAAAAAAH! It's getting into my wounds!"**

**Lilynette kicks the body and throws an encyclopedia onto him. **

**"...Nrrgh...ugh..."**

**"...Ok, ok... I think that's enough studyin'... Next one!" **

Are you really *SPOILER ALERT* dead Gin?

**"Yay! For me! Huh? Dead? I have no idea what ya talkin' about. You mean this?" Gin pulls down a screen to show the death scene. "You see, if you look very closely..." He takes out a pointer and points at an object near Gin in the video. "Ya see this? That's a price tag still on the giant plushie me you saw dyin'. All of this was just to-" Szayel raises his hand. "That's just a random piece of paper that flew onto the set. You died there and that is not a plushie you-" Gin gets in Szayel's face with his eyes opened in anger, "Shut'dap. I don't wanna explain why I'm here and not over there, dead. You're dead, too, do you wanna explain why you're here? Hm? Hm?!"**

**"Well, I have an idea-" Gin retracts his face and continues his cheery stance. ****"Aaaand we're outa time! See ya guys later! Szayel, go stand in the hallway."**

**"But-"**

**"Nuh-uh! Go stand." Szayel mutters to himself as he walks out the classroom door.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Teach us! Gin Ichi-sensei!**

**Grimmjow says out, "That thing at the beginning is starting to annoy me..."**

**"Oh come on! It's a nice way to start these things."**

**"The voices of little kids saying your name is not a good way to start."**

**"It's cute!"**

**"It's creepy."**

**"I should start attendance. Grimmjow?"**

**"Here."**

**"Ulquiorra?"**

**"Yes, sir."**

**"Szayel?"**

**"Here."**

**"Stark?"**

**"Kuqh...nrgh...*nose sniffle*... Here..."**

**"Lilynette?"**

**"Here!"**

**"Wonderweiss?"**

**"Ahhhhhhh..."**

**"Nnoitra?"**

**"Here!"**

**"Chad-kun?"**

**"Here."**

**"Orihime-chan?"**

**"Here!"**

**"Kuchiki-san?"**

**"Here."**

**"Ishida-san?"**

**"Here."**

**"Kurosaki-san?" It switches over to a Ichigo in a body cast.**

**"...Here..." Grimmjow says out, "Whoa, whoa, why are they here?"**

**"Because everyone else wasn't available and Aizen and Tosen can't do it. I needed them to fill the seats for this class."**

**"Wow, desperate much?"**

**"Movin' on! Today's lesson is about how you how you Arrancars and Espada are created."**

**"Blah, blah, you explained back in Arrancar Encyclopedia!" **

**"Okay... something new... um..." Gin gets a large book titled, "Bleach Stuff" and looks through it. "I got it! We'll do Quincy stuff!"**

**"Hello? That's why Quincy Encyclopedia exists?"**

**"Oh come on! They have Encyclopedias for everythin'! Fine, I'll teach ya on how humans are created." Szayel raises his hand, "Can we get the Quincy boy-"**

**"No, we're not dissectin' a human, I'm gonna pull down this chart." Uryu looks at Szayel with a glare. "You were planning to cut me up?"**

**"I want to see what's inside a human body."**

**"You cut up bodies everyday!" **

**"Tch. Those were HOLLOW or ARRANCAR bodies. I want HUMAN."**

**"Quiet over there." Gin pulls down a chart of a baby inside of a female human. "See? This is how those humans came into existence." Grimmjow raises his hand, "How does that thing get in there? Ya jam it up the girl's ass?"**

**"No... It's the opposite, the baby comes out of there."**

**"How does it go in there?"**

**"Sex." Nnoitra raises his hand, "Then why after I had sex with Halibel, she doesn't get that?"**

**"You guys are unable to reproduce. 'Cause... you're dead."**

**"Yeah! Sex doesn't earn me a brat!"**

**"Next in today's lesson, we learn of Kurosaki's fears."**

**"What?!"**

**"Ok! Let's see what Carrot boy is afraid of!" Gin pulls down another chart showing Ichigo standing next to several bubbles.**

**"His eyes fear Ulquiorra stabbing into his heart or Kenpachi coming after him. His head fears the Hollow in him. His mouth and nose fear Orihime-chan's cooking. His crotch fears Rukia's punches-"**

**"Whoa whoa! How do you even know this stuff?!"**

**"Your profile in Tite Kubo's latest info book had this."**

**"No, it isn't! He would never write that in there!"**

**"Ok, now question time!"**

Heard some rumours you proposed to Ran-chan  
Is it true?

**"Say what?"**

**"I though ya killed that b****!"**

**"Hang on... Well.. I... um... So, Ichigo's feet fear Kenpachi..."**

**"You're ignoring the topic!"**

**"Here's a video of Ichigo showering. This is how humans clean themselves."**

**"Oh NOOO! You're not showing that!"**

**"Yeah, I don't want to see his what's-his-thing."**

**"I do."**

**"Shut up, Szayel!"**

**"Oh my, look at the time. Bye-bye!"**

**"Hey, you can't just cancel-Ah!" A curtain falls on Ichigo. **


End file.
